The self-makeover is failing so far

Okay, so a while back I said I was going to give myself a makeover – sit up straighter, wear nice shoes, be more confident, yadda yadda yadda. Well, I think that lasted MAYBE a week. I don’t know what my problem is, I just can’t seem to get it together. I must WANT to hide and be a meek little mousy geek chick and not the FABULOUS, confident, go-getter woman that I know I can be….

I need to write some lists and make goals. This worked for me like a charm when I was in high school. Oh and I had a day planner that I just LIVED by. I think I started cracking with the whole lists and schedules when I lost that day planner one day during senior year of high school. I was pretty devastated about it. I bought a new one, and several new ones after that, but they just weren’t the same… I was like, ONE with that particular planner. Not sure why I haven’t been able to get back to being as efficient and organized as I was at the time.

Anyway, goals and lists. This is what I need to do. Oh yeah, I also used to write full schedules out. I have a Blackberry, which I guess I could use but it takes me forever to enter something in the calendar so maybe if I write things down in my new planner (which I have hardly used since I got it six months ago), maybe I’ll use it more often, and then follow through on my goals and tasks, and become more efficient and self-confident in accomplishing these goals, even if they’re small goals. Okay, to be honest… I actually started doing the list thing again and failed miserably at that! I mean the other day I wrote a VERY short list which I was supposed to get done when I got home: laundry, practice, work. I didn’t do ANY of those! Although seriously, those aren’t really fun things to do, are they? I really need to do laundry though, my closet is kinda hurting… it’s a whirlwind of clothes right now so I haven’t been able to find anything this week. Well, I guess I know what I’m doing on this Friday night. FUN!!! Maybe I just have to blog to talk myself into doing things. But for goodness sakes, I am a GROWNUP now. I should just DO these things… but working 40+ hours a week does kind of tend to be draining and all I want to do when I get home is absolutely nothing.

And I haven’t worked out at all! I swore up and down that I would do some form of exercise every day this week, and THAT hasn’t worked out at all. Man, I am slacking. Maybe my goal with that is to (and yes, I know this sounds incredibly superficial) just be “hot” by the time I’m 30. Maybe if I keep that in mind every day I’ll meet more of the workout goals at least, hahaha…. yeah, maybe I should approach self-improvement in a different way.

As far as being a better PERSON and doing community service and growing spiritually and everything… I know those are things I need to work on as well. I guess with those, the easiest thing to do is just to devote some amount of time for each of those. A little bit of time for spiritual devotion every day, community service once a week, how can it be hard to find time to do the really important things?? I just need to get my crap together, now! Enough excuses!